Post by Deleted on Jun 9, 2011 13:00:27 GMT -6
 | Santa Clothes |
Many look up to him when they're young but most do not know who Santa Claus really is. Sure, he tries to fit in with many of the GZW employees and makes an appearance once a year but since Santa branched out, he abandoned his sleigh and lost his way. Feeling challenged constantly by Jesus' thunder stealing and the Holy Son's theft of the spotlight at Christmas, he decided to spend his time away drowning his sorrows. Falling out with Rudolph recently and being frustrated with Shane Ryder's blatant disrespect tipped him over the edge. People have wondered why he's returned to the ring. Well, The Eye has the answers to their questions. His recent discrepencies in Lapland occured when he had his helpers wrapping batteries, insisting the parents could get the f*cking presents. Elf and Safety were also unimpressed by has lack of care in the workplace. He also failed a diversity test of the workplace when he insisted to get the f*cking mares in because men can't wrap presents for sh*t. His ethics were also in question after he was heard saying there is no such thing as Christmas, it's all anniversaries after the little sh*t was born.
Santa could do with his little helpers after this abomination was discovered on the backstreets of Hong Kong though when The Camera Eye caught Santa in a drunken haze after interacting just a little too much in a local strip joint. Local Police tried to arrest him for indecent exposure but responded by threatening them with the fact he is related to the Main Clause. He was later released on bail though who paid for his release remains unknown. Nice going, Santa.
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