Post by Sir Chris Cairns on Mar 16, 2015 18:58:43 GMT -6
We're in a hotel lobby in downtown Texas and GZW2K1's Senior Interviewer Weston Bentley is stood beside a disheveled, tired and depleted looking John Smith.
Bentley: Ladies and gentlemen, I am standing by with Creation Wrestling II's Commissioner John Smith, who is the second in command to Sir Chris Cairns. John, with all due respect, it is Cairns himself who I was scheduled to interview here tonight, so where is he?
Smith gives a raspy clearing of his throat, visibly shaking as he tries to compose himself and keep his voice steady.
Smith: Well, SIR Chris Cairns - who was Knighted by the Queen in a glittering ceremony at Buckingham Palace - is absolutely furious about what happened here tonight at Anniversary Armageddon, and rightfully so! Thus, SIR Chris Cairns - the 2013 Globalstar of the Year, lest we forget - will not be dealing with the press and will be making absolutely no public appearances until further notice.
Bentley: And what exactly is Chris Cairns 'furious' about, John? Is he perhaps disappointed about the fact that his longtime rival Stephon Davis pinned him here tonight in Texas?
Bentley thrusts the microphone towards Smith for an answer, causing the uncharismatic weed to flinch.
Smith: Uh... Well... Did you see the quality of officiating from Referee Sonny Bright? Everybody saw that SIR Chris Cairns pinned Tamer for the three count and yet Sonny Bright did nothing about it.
Bentley: Is Cairns really deluded enough to think that he has a case here? Tamer wasn't even the legal m-
Smith: Careful, Bentley! You don't want to say anything that you might regret!
Weston Bentley pauses. He frowns as he sizes John Smith up.
Bentley: Is that a threat, John Smith?
John Smith holds his ground for a second or two, but soon bows his sweat-drenched head meekly.
Smith: Uh... No, sir. Look, I'm sorry, it's just a very stressful ti-
Bentley: So, what is to be Cairns' next move? Would it be wise to assume that his lust for Stephon Davis' blood will continue?
Smith: This is not about a 'lust for blood' and I resent your phrasing of that question. SIR Chris Cairns has explained countless times exactly why he is targeting Stephon Davis and not one man, woman or child has found fault with SIR Chris Cairns' reasoning or methods.
Bentley: WHAT?! The entire wrestling industry is sickened by the continued actions of Cairns! He tried to end Stephon Davis' life!
Smith: Tell me, Weston Bentley: what exactly has Stephon Davis done to deserve his shot at the "Wild Card" Eddie Knoxville Television Championship belt? Why is Stephon Davis set to compete for that title on the upcoming edition of Crimson on March 29th? The answer is simple: nepotism!
Bentley: Oh, not this again!
Smith: Bentley, I find your methods of journalism to be riddled with bias and alarming irresponsibility. I am ending this interview right now!
Bentley: Fine!
Smith turns to the camera and tries to muster up all the conviction that his pathetic form can possibly put forward.
Smith: Stephon Davis, you can rest assured that you haven't heard the last of SIR Chris Cairns... and at Crimson on March 29th? Maybe SIR Chris Cairns will have himself a front-row seat for your title match...
Smith heads off while mopping his brow with a handkerchief, bringing this bland filler segment (which is still better than any Stpehon Davis promo ever) to conclusion. Fade to knickers.
Bentley: Ladies and gentlemen, I am standing by with Creation Wrestling II's Commissioner John Smith, who is the second in command to Sir Chris Cairns. John, with all due respect, it is Cairns himself who I was scheduled to interview here tonight, so where is he?
Smith gives a raspy clearing of his throat, visibly shaking as he tries to compose himself and keep his voice steady.
Smith: Well, SIR Chris Cairns - who was Knighted by the Queen in a glittering ceremony at Buckingham Palace - is absolutely furious about what happened here tonight at Anniversary Armageddon, and rightfully so! Thus, SIR Chris Cairns - the 2013 Globalstar of the Year, lest we forget - will not be dealing with the press and will be making absolutely no public appearances until further notice.
Bentley: And what exactly is Chris Cairns 'furious' about, John? Is he perhaps disappointed about the fact that his longtime rival Stephon Davis pinned him here tonight in Texas?
Bentley thrusts the microphone towards Smith for an answer, causing the uncharismatic weed to flinch.
Smith: Uh... Well... Did you see the quality of officiating from Referee Sonny Bright? Everybody saw that SIR Chris Cairns pinned Tamer for the three count and yet Sonny Bright did nothing about it.
Bentley: Is Cairns really deluded enough to think that he has a case here? Tamer wasn't even the legal m-
Smith: Careful, Bentley! You don't want to say anything that you might regret!
Weston Bentley pauses. He frowns as he sizes John Smith up.
Bentley: Is that a threat, John Smith?
John Smith holds his ground for a second or two, but soon bows his sweat-drenched head meekly.
Smith: Uh... No, sir. Look, I'm sorry, it's just a very stressful ti-
Bentley: So, what is to be Cairns' next move? Would it be wise to assume that his lust for Stephon Davis' blood will continue?
Smith: This is not about a 'lust for blood' and I resent your phrasing of that question. SIR Chris Cairns has explained countless times exactly why he is targeting Stephon Davis and not one man, woman or child has found fault with SIR Chris Cairns' reasoning or methods.
Bentley: WHAT?! The entire wrestling industry is sickened by the continued actions of Cairns! He tried to end Stephon Davis' life!
Smith: Tell me, Weston Bentley: what exactly has Stephon Davis done to deserve his shot at the "Wild Card" Eddie Knoxville Television Championship belt? Why is Stephon Davis set to compete for that title on the upcoming edition of Crimson on March 29th? The answer is simple: nepotism!
Bentley: Oh, not this again!
Smith: Bentley, I find your methods of journalism to be riddled with bias and alarming irresponsibility. I am ending this interview right now!
Bentley: Fine!
Smith turns to the camera and tries to muster up all the conviction that his pathetic form can possibly put forward.
Smith: Stephon Davis, you can rest assured that you haven't heard the last of SIR Chris Cairns... and at Crimson on March 29th? Maybe SIR Chris Cairns will have himself a front-row seat for your title match...
Smith heads off while mopping his brow with a handkerchief, bringing this bland filler segment (which is still better than any Stpehon Davis promo ever) to conclusion. Fade to knickers.
